The Greatest Invention Ever...No Really

I just found possibly one of the most useful things in my lifetime. No, not a really fast electric car, or even a Feline Stay-Fresh Drinking Fountain...(which is sold out by the way due to its immense popularity) No dear brothers and sisters I'm talking about the Procrastinator's Clock. What? Me? A Procrastinator? Those who know me best would say I am, though I like to say I manage my tasks to be done when they need to be not when they could be... Anyway this particular clock courtesy of David Seah runs 15 minutes fast. Not impressed are you? You can do that with a normal clock? Ahhh, but does your clock speed up and slow down unpredictably? Didn't think so. The slogan for this fine product is really great: "This clock runs fast up to 15 minutes...or does it?

You never know if you're 15 minutes ahead or if you're right on time - so you can't cheat.

This needs to be a function put into all alarm clocks. Why hasn't someone thought of this before? Millions of dollars are waiting to be made.

Well, I need to end this post - I'm late for work...

Future Blackmail in the Making

Since shifting my business model to be more focused on my name rather than that of my company I google my name every so often to see where I am in the rankings. It's also a good excuse to do a vanity search... For the past couple of years the top entries on almost every search engine were related to a soldier by the same name who had died in Iraq. This was quite eerie when it first happened because the soldier also happens to be from Colorado. Since I switched to Wordpress I have noticed my ranking climb higher and higher and now I am the number one ranking on Google, Yahoo, and others.

While doing this I thought I would see where Mia and Mickie ranked. They were number one as well which wasn't a huge surprise because those names are less common than Josh. What was surprising was the text that went along with Mia's entry.


So when she's 15 and being belligerent I can pull out this picture and let her know that at one point the biggest search engine in the world had a conversation about her underwear as it's number one ranking...

In case you didn't read it, google is referencing a post I made a bit ago about how on a trip Mickie and Mia switched suitcases and ended up with each others clothes. You can read about it here.

Fortunately these things are volatile and should change soon.

I need to work on my "spitting"

I just came across this article and had to share it with all peeps in the hizzle... I from time to time have been known to bust a rhyme...okay not really but I do like to make drum noises with my mouth (otherwise known as "vocal percussion" or "beat boxing"). So I have a little spot dedicated in my heart to free stylin' rap. I like to think I'm cool and break out with a little rhyme every now and then, but I always need to rehearse it for awhile before I try and get spontaneous on anyone.

So, this morning I found this article in the inbox in my rss reader.

"How to Survive a Freestyle Rap Battle" Wow! Does it get any better than that? You can click on the link for the full details but let me give you the basics.

  1. Listen to great freestylers
  2. Practice, practice, practice (there is no substitute for this-ever)
  3. Start writing rhymes (that would be lines and words that sound alike, here is an example...Jesusa loves me, this I knowa, for thee-ah Bible tells me-a so-ah...) That last example works best if said with a little caribbean flava.
  4. Once you can "spit on the spot" (spitting is a another term for freestyling), try and "spit" about more specific things. (hmmmm, sometimes when I am on a bridge or a tall building I try and spit on a spot.)
  5. Jump in and battle someone
  6. Here is my favorite tip...and I am not making this up...okay ready? Make sure your first battle is against someone you dislike - it will make it easier for you to throw in denegrating metaphors (a key staple in any rap battle), personal disses, and punch lines (a combination of the two.) Here is an example. "Yo, you be trippen on yo wal-mart drawers, and you eat garbage from a can cause you so poor. Word." My CD will be out in the late for it.
  7. And last, don't worry if you lose your first few battles. Again practice is the key.

If you do read the article I would like to direct your attention to the warning near the bottom of the page. "Spitting, as refered to in the article does not refer to "saliva expulsion" but rather a poetic combination of wordage.

I would invite all you to try out your mad skills and throw out some mad spits here on the comments. Keep it clean yo. I'm out.

Another Cool Mapping Site

I just found another really swell mapping site. This site is using a Flash interface connected with Google and MSN's maps. The experience is a lot smoother then that of Google or MSN earth alone. You can slide in out seemlessly and drag the map in all directions with your cursor. I think the satellite imagery is a lot clearer as well. Check it out. I think it is the best mapping program I have seen.


One more before I go to bed... I discovered a new cool thing tonight called Blingo! So What is Blingo? Blingo is a new twist on the search engine. Blingo combines the greatness of Google (it uses Google for it's search results) and the excitement of Bingo or a raffle, but here is the's free!

All you have to do is search like you normally do on Google and if your search is chosen you can win a prize. I researched this for awhile and from a lot of different testimonials it is completely legit. It is not one of those things where you have to complete a survey or they promise a free $50 gift card to Applebees but a fun legit site where you can win cool stuff.

So how do they afford to give away free stuff with no catch? Just like Google and a lot of other sites they have paid advertisers links on the side.

Here is another cool thing, if you get your friends to sign up, when they win you win!

So sign up today and start searching with Blingo. Here is the link which will also refer you as my friend. Let me know if you have any questions.